What I Learned at Disney World and a Dream Come True

I’m just back from Disney and have some unexpected impressions to share.

After this recent visit to The Magic Kingdom I read up on the history of one of my most admired childhood cartoon heroes. The idea for Mickey Mouse came to Walt Disney on a train trip from Manhattan to Hollywood. His career had taken a nose dive and he and his brother faced a possible end to their previous small successes if they couldn’t rise above the disastrous, blatant theft of one of their most popular characters – a rabbit named Oswald.

In Walt’s own words, “All we ever intended for him (Mickey Mouse) or expected of him was that he should continue to make people everywhere chuckle with him and at him. We didn’t burden him with any social symbolism, we made him no mouthpiece for frustrations or harsh satire. Mickey was simply a little personality assigned to the purposes of laughter.”

After a few faltering steps, Mickey was off and running generating laughter and endearment around the world. From this bit of information I realized Mickey symbolizes hope, dreams come true, perseverance, and love that grew out of one man’s wish to give people the gift of merriment.

When I was 9, the more famous characters at Disneyland in California tended to be elusive. Back then I met Cinderella, Alice from Wonderland and the March Hare, and had my picture taken with one of seven small friends of Snow White, Happy I think it was. A few other characters wandered in the distance and I left my one-day visit with the disappointment of a little girl whose fondest wish was to meet the famous mouse.

In my twenties I had no better luck. A similar smattering of princesses and colorful cartoon pals whisked by on my second visit to Disney’s Magic Kingdom, this time at Disney World in Florida. My heart leapt at the sight of Mickey and Minnie waving from a distant parade float with hundreds of people waving back to them, forming an impenetrable wall between me and the illustrious pair. The reason hope of meeting one little person dressed in a mouse costume (albeit a famous mouse costume) sustained so many spirits, including my own, escaped my comprehension. Why did my mood sag when the hope was not fulfilled?

My initial assumption was that Mickey took me back to a happier time, early childhood before my mother became ill. It made sense I would want to relive those special moments. That alone is reason enough to cry happy tender tears, but when I looked up the history of the mouse and his creator after my most recent visit, there was more, much more. It dawned on me that Mickey and friends, with their cartoon antics, had lifted me out of the dire circumstances of my mother’s illness every Saturday morning the way he had lifted Walt out of the foreshadowing of failure...and now he stood poised to lift me out of the doldrums of a strange and sometimes frightening world.

In keeping with my understanding that everything carries its own energy, Mickey too, I believe, exudes the goodness he stands for. I imagine that whoever is chosen for the honor of wearing the outfit must also radiate the same goodness.

I knew little of his history when tears formed in my eyes as Mickey arrived in his train for opening ceremonies on my first day at the park last week. “Good morning! Good Morning! Sun beams are shinin’ through! Good Morning! Good Morning to you!” One look at his squeaky clean presence and I lost it. The next day Minnie passed through the crowd and tears rolled down my cheeks again. What is going on with me? Each time I entered a ride or watched a performance I remembered from childhood the floodgates opened. If I was a proper adult I’d think “How embarrassing!” but instead, how wonderful to experience some kind of mysterious magic reaching beyond my adult exterior!

With perfect timing this trip occurred during one of the worst weeks I’ve ever known. I’d been fending off bouts of sadness, trying to maintain my usual bright outlook, working hard to not get swallowed up in months of devastating current events and the worst prelude to a Presidential election I’ve ever witnessed. If ever I needed magic it was now. Though at the beginning of the visit I did not think it possible, Mickey and friends opened a window where glimmers of cheer could drift in with a wave of their magic wands.

One thing stood out as I walked the packed streets of this vibrant fantastic world of Disney. There were no political signs. No rallies with candidates shooting disparaging words at one another. No religious orders defending their claims as the one true and only way to God. No people indulging in desperate disputes on social media or in town hall meetings.  If anyone cared one way or another about ethnicity or sexual preference or who won the election or who earned their ticket to heaven and who did not, they let it go here in a poof of fairy dust. Everyone was there in pursuit of magic and joy, if not their own then for their children. There were smiles, kindnesses aplenty, patience in long lines, and laughter, LOTS of laughter. Laughter that would have made the wizard who initiated it all very proud.

I came to the stunning conclusion that if humans can let all the strife and hostility go in a magical kingdom for a day or a week, they can let it go indefinitely. If we humans are capable of the incredible feats of technological magic that stream from every attraction in that park I am confident we can love better, fight less, listen more, seek to understand each other, and together envision a brighter future for ourselves and our children. Though these thoughts came later I am certain this is what Mickey intended for me to pass on to you when my lifelong dream came true…

Due to some ticketing mix-ups our whole gang was treated to a private audience with the Mouse with the Most. My eyes rimmed with tears one last time when we entered his chamber and he said, “Hi everybody!” He was every bit as real as stars and sunbeams and wishes that rise up from the heart. I whispered to him that I’d waited to meet him since I was nine and he thanked me for coming. After a few photos I thanked him too. Though I didn’t say exactly what I was thanking him for, on some level I think he knew it was for resuscitating my spirit. Maybe he saw it in my eyes because just as I turned to go he reached out and gave me the best, the warmest, the most sincere magical mouse hug anyone could ever imagine.

I’m thankful for one blessed idea and the man who nurtured it into being. Now let’s turn the tables and give him and his little mouse companion what they have given so many millions of children and children-at-heart: smiles and laughter and a land that welcomes every person and nurtures every spirit.

Be the change and laugh as often as you can.

Love, Robin

Listening for Your Heart

There is special kind of listening called listening with the heart that unlocks a treasure unlike anything else. Listening with the heart creates connection between two people, two countries, and even between a person and themselves or their natural surroundings. Listening with the heart helps you, well, get to the heart of the matter. It strengthens bonds. It opens the door for healing to occur. And it’s good for your health!

You are not alone if you have difficulty listening. It is one of our most common interpersonal relationship stumbling blocks. There is only one way to access the key to better listening. You must turn off all those red buttons that go off in your mind. The flashing red lights that have you preparing a response without really hearing what the other person is saying. The buttons that project your own meaning on what is being said instead of listening to understand the other person’s meaning. And worst of all, the buttons that urge you to jump in and interrupt because you think you have something more important to say OR because what a person is saying makes you uncomfortable prompting you to talk over and shut the person up altogether.

I was in a health care workshop once when the facilitator began to speak about how to handle someone who emotes in your presence and perhaps shares an experience that is causing them concern. His simple advice? Listen. He said, “If a client emotes with you it is a sign that they trust you enough to allow a peek into their innermost being. This goes for anyone who allows themselves to be vulnerable with you whether in business or personal interactions. It is a sacred moment and one you should be honored to witness. Be quiet. Give your full attention and respect.” He went on to say, “If you find you have difficulty hearing someone’s story or observing their tears, I strongly urge you to seek therapy to find out why. That is something going on inside of YOU that needs to be addressed and healed.”

While undergoing a training in body-centered psychotherapy I learned to listen with my whole being. When the traditional senses of sight, hearing, and touch join together with well-honed intuition and empathy – while allowing the mind to retreat to the background - we can be said to be listening with the heart. This requires “tuning in” completely to the other person. Most of my client sessions involved quiet, focused listening to what the person’s whole being was telling me. Quite often during a session I did little more than mirror back the few words uttered by the client. At the conclusion, inevitably the client reported feeling truly understood though I had added little or no input. The client was able to pull together lost parts of themselves and begin to heal simply because they were heard with unbiased, unconditional regard for what their experience was in a given moment. Healing does not need to be in a clinical setting to occur.

Listening is an extremely pleasurable experience when you do it with the intention of really connecting with another human being and meeting them on their own level. The opposite, interrupting or talking over a person, raises blood pressure for both parties and is often cause for two people moving further away from each other rather than closer to understanding and compassion. This makes sense when you consider the work of Dr. Rick Bommelje and Dr. Manny Steil whose "Listening Leaders Newsletter" reports the effects of interrupting on your health:

Several university studies have found that people who interrupt conversations are at greater risk for heart problems. In fact, one study at Duke University found that people who interrupt are up to seven times more likely to get heart disease! Why is this so? The researchers theorize that people who interrupt are excessively competitive and controlling - two hallmarks of the worst "Type A" personalities.

But here is the amazing kicker: These same high-risk people can lower their risk without totally altering their personalities...and without any drugs, exercise or dietary changes. All they have to do is practice being good listeners.

If you are someone who tends to interrupt or gets anxious during a conversation there is plenty of information available to help you learn how to listen. Here’s a great short video from Ornish Lifestyle Medicine to get you started: https://www.ornish.com/video/feeling-others/  When you have more time, Leon Berg offers great suggestions in his TEDx talk https://youtu.be/6iDMuB6NjNA

Your significant others and business colleagues will thank you! 

Peace of the day to you and happy listening, Robin

The Art of Acceptance

  As I send out my prayers and love to all people who face the wrath of Hurricane Matthew, a thought occurred to me that is in some way comforting. I ask all who read this to put things into perspective and please read to the end for the full message. Natural disasters and the associated damage and death tolls have been a fact of life since the beginning of time. When we watch the news we forget this reality because devastation and fear mongering sells. Because it is happening NOW in our lifetime, we realize it could happen to us. We don’t like knowing we are vulnerable and one day we will die somehow, some way.

  We forget that we are also SURVIVORS. We get up each morning in spite of it all as we have for millenia. We grieve. We restore. We move on.

  YES it is sad that one precious life is cut short – someone’s mother or sister or child. AND what is the best thing we can do to honor those lost lives? I say it is to LIVE each day to the fullest – days they might have wished they could enjoy. Revere the rising and setting sun, the trees, the lakes, the oceans. Glory in the gentle breeze against your skin. Go out and jump in puddles in the middle of a rainstorm. Play, dance, sing, create, and have hope like it’s going out of style! Savor the wholesome variety of foods that are available to you each and every day. Be thankful for the home that shelters you as best it can and the clothing that protects you from the elements. Appreciate the wild creatures who grace our planet and the domestic furred friends who add so much joy and pleasure to your days.   Above all, offer gratitude for the life you have been given, CHERISH those who walk beside you, and let’s work TOGETHER to care for and preserve OUR Mother Earth for generations to come. We don’t have total control, and there IS A LOT WE CAN DO!

  As you listen to the tallies of today’s damage and loss and any that occurs in the future, realize how our populations have grown exponentially through the centuries. Imagine how devastating it was to lose 50,000 people in 365CE when there were far fewer people on the earth. Here is just a fraction of what has occurred since then, not to mention deaths that occurred in wars and hate crimes:

January 12, 2010 - A powerful earthquake destroyed much of Haiti and killed over 200,000 people.

1887 - The Huang Ho River flooded and killed 900,000.

August 26, 1883 - The island volcano Krakatoa, Indonesia erupted and killed 36,000.

October 5, 1864 - Calcutta, India denuded by a cyclone that killed 70,000.

November 1, 1755 - An earthquake in Lisbon, Portugal killed 70,000. Resulting heavy damage from ensuing fires and tsunami flooding in Morocco killed nearly 250,000 people.

March 11, 1669 - Mt. Etna, Sicily erupted killing 15,000. On March 25 it erupted again destroying Nicolosi and killing 20,000 more.

Feb 2 1556 - Worst earthquake in history Shangxi Province, China killing 830,000.

July 21, 365 CE - An earthquake leveled the Egyptian Port of Alexandria killing an estimated 50,000 people.

Please don’t buy what the fear-mongers are selling. You’ve been given a precious life and other precious lives to go with you on the journey. You have the choice to spend your gift wisely with love and joy as your focus OR to sit under a dark cloud of worry about things out of your control. I wish you peace and beauty and love, Robin

Rain

Water speaks to your heart when you listen. On this day of Rain weaving in and out of the hours, what does she say to you? You may want to go make yourself a cup of tea, sit back in your favorite cozy chair, and close your eyes.

The softer gray light wraps my mind in a pleasant haze and I start getting all poetic on days like today. I've piled dry wood around the wood stove, ready for the first fire and thoughts of wool sweaters and long johns drift in the periphery. Winter is not my favorite season for its frigid temperatures and icy roads, but I do love the mystical quality of a fresh blanket of snow and drinking hot chocolate and baking sweet treats that fill the air with anticipation. Right now the wheel has just turned toward autumn and in order to stay in the present I want to enjoy every falling leaf, every coolish breeze, every snap of a crisp apple, and every pumpkin that brightens the fields. Winter will come soon enough and today Rain calls for attention.

Rain has been elusive these last few weeks but she needs to show off her talents now and again. Without her the world is parched and thirsty for love. Love that nourishes. Love that heals. Love that cleanses and soothes the cracked skin of Mother Earth. Love that urges all of life to grow and flourish.

Without Rain the Sun works overtime, the Moon has too little privacy, and Clouds fear retirement. Oceans and Rivers crave her presence. A Stream will not flow without rain.

Without Rain there is no impish jumping and splashing, no mud, and no bare toes meeting slippery pleasure. Rain loves the upturned faces of children, those who are young and those who remember.

Rain, Clouds, and Sun meet in sky studios to create what they could not accomplish alone. The timing, the placement, the light must be perfect. Let your dreams dance up across their arched artistry and down the other side. Later, the Moon will bathe you in her warmth and share stories of mirrored lakes and diamond rain drops. “Rain,” the Moon will tell you, “holds the very keys to existence.”

Be thankful for Rain! Where would we be without her?

Enjoy your tea!

Robin

Now That's Freedom!

Today was the day. My third visit to a dental office to complete a root canal. Yay – it would be over with and ugh - I had to work up my enthusiasm for the long drive and dreaded task.

I waited an unusually long time – a half hour – before checking with the receptionist. “Yes, he knows you’re here,” she said. It was the first time I had to wait at all and I saw the doctor peek around the corner several times as though looking for someone. Someone other than me.

At last, after he consulted with another doctor and the receptionist, my name was called. It was not the best news. After driving 65 minutes into the city, 15 minutes to park my car and walk the maze of hospital hallways, and a total of 40 minutes in the reception area, my ears heard, “There’s been a mix up with the schedule. Can you come back tomorrow?”

A profusion of apologies bounced from doctor to receptionist and back again and I was offered a free comprehensive exam. No I can’t come back tomorrow and a comprehensive exam is not what I came here for. You can imagine the way my belly did a flip and I felt emotion, somewhere between sadness and exasperation rising up through my innards. But I held my self together and thanked everyone involved. “It happens,” I sighed.

My gut did not agree as I retrieved my car and figured the expense in gas and parking fees and counted off all the things I might have done with my afternoon. In the silence of my car a band of tension tightened around my solar plexus and I huffed out a few loud exhales to release the excess energy.

A little forethought goes a long way. I’d brought some meditation CDs with me. Yes, I know you’re not supposed to meditate while driving and the one I popped into the player contained more of a conversation about how to meditate. A soft, soothing, male voice said to stay in the present moment. Don’t go into the past or future with your thoughts. Stay fully present in your body.

This was no easy endeavor because my mind was jumping to home, back to the dental office, asking what errands I could run to make good of this outrageously long drive. Then I thought, what is my experience in this moment? My experience is my creation! What do I want to create? Do I want to waste these precious moments of my life ruminating? I could choose to belly ache about a wasted afternoon that I had no power to change. I could berate the person who caused the mistake. I could be a prisoner in my vehicle or I could enjoy the ride. How do I enjoy the ride?

I dared to duck into the past just long enough to remember that being in a moving vehicle, as a 5 month old, soothed my colic. My 8 year old self, thought driving was something to look forward to. I begged my Dad to let me sit in the car to “drive” myself to faraway places. ­I felt the thrill of gripping a tiny steering wheel, guiding a miniature car between rubber bumpers on an amusement park kiddie road. My 17 year old self couldn’t wait to get a driver’s permit. I’m so grown up! Look at me! Driving!

So why can’t I do that now, in the present?

I can! I let my body fill up with all those past joys. I noticed the beautiful scenery and the glint of sun off nearby cars. I pointed the car toward Dunkin Donuts to treat myself to an iced coffee, then to Trader Joe’s to pick up a few staples. Wow! The day is so beautiful! Blue sky! Pretty white clouds! Look at me! Driving anywhere I please! I AM FREE! Free to change my mind. Free to create a better experience. Free to CHOOSE what to do with my emotions, to free my diaphragm of tension, to let my shoulders and forehead relax. I always have choices. All it takes is to stop, breathe, and consider the options.

I wish you many of these crossroads. May you choose the beautiful day.

Earth Divine has a cover!

Life is a learn as you go process and I've learned a lot these last few weeks! After asking you to vote (and I am extremely grateful for all of your input) on book cover designs for Earth Divine - Adventures of an Everyday Mystic, a friend sent a helpful link on a different aspect of the book that led to another helpful link and I soon discovered that even the most voted for cover won't do as posted. Book cover design is quite a science and one I knew little about. After much study I went back to the drawing board, considered all of your comments on the first covers, and feel I have a winner! 

I'm pulling together all the loose strings that need pulling and continue to learn about Create Space. As I move closer to actual publication I will reveal the new cover and some other surprises that have come this way!

Stay-tuned and keep growing!

Robin