The first thing in my Facebook news feed yesterday was the image of my best friend Dina and her buddy since high school, Frank Hutton - my friend grieving his death. I never met Frank in person, but in a very special way we met on another level in 2011 when he asked (via Dina) if I could polish up a personal story he'd written down. The experience touched him, changed him, turned his world around. The story brought tears to my eyes and changed me too. On this past Saturday, January 23, 2016 I messaged him to ask if I could have permission to include his story in a book I'm writing about such things - angels, love, and our invisible connection to each other, even when not connected by physical location. Frank messaged back, "Absolutely!" with a thumbs up symbol. I thanked him and said the story still gave me "warm fuzzies" and he offered another thumbs up. I'm honored to have met Frank on the level that he allowed me to see a tender side, a vulnerable part of himself. I am honored to share his story here with all who love and are missing him now...may this give you a smile and may he live on in your hearts.
“It had been
a rough year. I was lonely, raw from a
very painful divorce, and though the sun shines brightly most days in Florida,
my perspective on life was pretty bleak.
I was not proud of the part I played in bringing my marriage of 23 years
to an end. It was clear that I’d been
heading down the wrong path and realized I needed to make changes, using my
past mistakes as a guide. Once I became
willing to change, some pretty amazing things started to take place and I will
do my best to re-create those events for you here. They say good things happen in three’s…
In December of 2010, I went to drop off a
holiday donation at Labrador Rescue Retrievers.
Pat and Lewis, managers of the local chapter, met me at the door with big
smiles and ushered me in. We exchanged Christmas greetings and as we talked
Lewis excused himself so he could take “Rolo” for a walk.
When Lewis
opened the door to Rolo’s crate, the full grown, brown lab took off across the
room, came right over to where I was standing, and sat down next to me. I
looked down at Rolo and he looked up with big, sad eyes. Lewis said, “Frank, I think you have a new
pet.”
Lewis was
right, and the timing could not have been better! Within a week I brought Rolo home and we’ve
been the best of friends ever since.
He’s been a great companion; someone to love and care for who returns
love to me unconditionally just when I need it the most. It’s so easy to love this huge-hearted animal
who is so patient with me and knows when I am feeling blue. A smile comes to my face and I automatically
feel better when he follows me around. Sometimes I look over at him during one
of our frequent car rides and realize that this four-legged canine taught me
how to live again.
Rolo is just
one example of how I believe a higher power interceded to help me get through
what I was going through at that time.
Though the sun shone brightly one June afternoon, things appeared dull
and dismal to me as I drove home after a day’s work as a fire
investigator. Since coastal Florida
offers a number of opportunities to pass by a beach, I often pack an extra set
of clothes so I can rinse off the soot and grime of the day in the beach facilities.
That Friday I also hoped to wipe away some of the gloom, regret, and loneliness
I still carried at times.
On this
particular day, after my shower, I found an empty bench facing the ocean, sat
down to breathe in the fresh, salt air, and enjoy the view. I will never again be able to pass by that
spot on Flagler Avenue without remembering what happened next.
As I watched
the waves crash and wondered what to do for a late lunch/early dinner, a dark
cloud of despair still hung over me. I heard a young child’s voice in the
distance and turned to look in the direction of the sound. There I saw a young mother and her small
daughter, laden with bags, walking toward me.
They were within a short distance of where I was sitting when I heard
the child tell her mom, “Mommy, you left your coffee in the car. Go ahead and get it. I’ll wait here.” As young as she was, maybe about six years
old, her mannerisms were very adult-like.
The child was
dressed in a bathing suit, hat, and flip flops, and held her armload of little
girl necessities. One bag with a rainbow
design on the side was filled with brightly colored, plastic beach toys. About 5 Barbie dolls peered out through the
clear sides of the other bag. Her mom
wore a sundress, also in rainbow colors.
In my line of work you have to be detailed, understand what you
see. That day, my investigative skills
allowed me to remember a lot of detail that would later prove quite valuable.
The mother
said she would only be a minute, told the child to wait, and promptly left the
area to return to her car. I turned back to look at the ocean and continued to
mull over what to have for dinner, thinking that the child and her mother would
soon be on their way. Only a second or two
later I turned again toward the place where the child last stood waiting and to
my surprise she was sitting right next to me on the bench!
The child
looked up at me and smiled, her blondish hair waving in the breeze. “Mister are you going to the beach?
“I don’t
think so,” I replied. I’m just sitting
here on the bench, enjoying the view of the ocean.”
“My mommy is
taking me to the beach. We’re going in a
minute,” she informed me. “She just went
to get her coffee because she left it in the car.”
“Looks like
you packed well for the beach and you’re going to have a good time!” I said.
“Yes,” said
the little girl. “I am. In this bag (the
rainbow bag) I have some plastic toys that I can fill with sand and make
castles, and in this bag (with the clear sides) I have my Barbie dolls. I want
to build a castle for each one of them. I’ve been looking forward to this all
week and I’m very excited! And if I am good my mommy is going to take me into
the water!”
Then, in a
very serious tone the child asked, “Mister, would you like to be my beach
buddy? I have several beach buddies but
it looks like you could use one. Beach buddies help each other out.”
I was stunned
by her directness and insight at such a young age. At the same time, my head was reeling with
thoughts of what might come next and I looked around to see if this was some
kind of joke…like someone from Candid Camera would suddenly rise up out of the
sand and say I was on the show. Then I
thought, “Oh no! What if Chris Hansen
from Dateline NBC is hiding somewhere and he jumps out, shoves a microphone in
my face, and says, ‘We see you talking
to this little girl, do you know how young she is?’” Then I’d be hauled off to jail or something.
But it wasn’t
that at all. This was much more. It was
far from a coincidence or chance meeting.
Somehow it seemed that this child could see inside of me to the
loneliness and pain I still felt from my recent separation and divorce.
Then came the
biggest surprise. This old soul,
disguised as a little girl, reached into one of her bags and pulled out a
multi-colored rock. “This is my buddy
rock, I want you to have it and as long as you have it good things will happen
to you.”
I
hesitated. “Well I don’t know, I think
you should keep it. It’s a beautiful
rock and if it’s brought you good luck and friends you might want to keep it.”
But she
insisted, “Someone told me long time ago that if I see someone who needs a
buddy rock to give it to them, and not only will good things happen to me, but
the person who I gave the rock to will also have good luck.”
How does one
so small measure “a long time ago?” She then told me to open my hand. How could I say no? She placed the rock into the palm of my right
hand and said, “This is yours now. Things
will be better; I know they will. That’s
how it works!”
I thanked her
and promised, “I will protect the buddy rock and every time I look at it I will
think of you. If I see someone in
trouble I will pass the buddy rock on to them.”
“Mister, that
is what the rock is all about,” and with wisdom beyond her years, she left me
with one last instruction, “Once you feel better, and when it’s time you’ll
know it, you will give the rock to the next person.”
This kind of
experience was new to me and I was still inclined to look around nervously,
expecting I’d be in serious trouble when her mother returned and saw a strange
man accepting her precious rock. But it
didn’t happen.
As her mom
approached I thanked the girl again and told her to have a good day. In a matter of seconds, mother and child
walked hand in hand, toward the beach entrance.
I looked away for a brief instant and when I turned back both mother and
child were gone. I scanned all around the beach for at least five minutes, but
they were nowhere to be found. It was as
though they had simply disappeared in a puff of smoke!
At the time I
didn’t think too much of it, but later on I thought how could they have
disappeared so quickly? All I know is
that after receiving the buddy rock, my outlook was a lot sunnier. The girl, wearing
a rainbow outfit befitting a super-hero of sorts, chased away my dark clouds.
Within three
weeks of having the buddy rock the strangest of strange happened and again I do
not believe any of these occurrences to be “coincidence.” In my family it is no
secret that for personal reasons my oldest sister, Charon, and myself did not
get along for a many years. I made plans
to go to a party at the local firehouse in a town where my other sister
lives. I called to ask her if it would
be ok to stay at her place. She agreed
and also made a request that I try to patch up the bad relationship between
Charon and I.
It had been
many years since Charon and I last talked…bad blood, as they say and it seemed
impossible that anything could ever mend the rift between us. My other sister mentioned to me that Charon
was in fair shape health wise and asked if I would be willing to talk to her.
Without hesitation I said yes.
Though we had
not spoken to each other for years, during the 10 days I visited, a new relationship
blossomed between Charon and I. I can’t
explain it, but our time together went surprisingly well. We talked every day
and continued to mend the fences that stood broken between us. We’re still building this new friendship and
it’s working.
I am coming
to the full realization of how one small event, taking place in mere seconds or
minutes, can change your life for the better if you allow it to. As I type this story, I have Rolo at my side
and the buddy rock is safely stored in my SUV where it will remain until the
day comes when it’s time to place it in someone else’s hand. Every time I see it there, I remember the
small child and her mother appearing to me surrounded in rainbow colors, at a
time when I was being swallowed up by an inner storm. In my mind, it became obvious that they were
more than human, sent by some mysterious higher power…angels maybe? Though the
conversation between that young child and I lasted only a minute or two, her
wise words and generous gift of the buddy rock will remain etched in my mind
for a lifetime.
The effects
of that one good deed continue to be revealed.
Part of my plan for healing has included what is now almost seven
straight weeks of attending church and by the time you read this, it will be
more. For most of my adult life I
avoided church, only going for weddings or funerals. But now I want to go; to participate on every
possible Sunday that I can.
What I offer
to those of you who read this, who may be going through what I’ve been through
is this: When you are in a bad
situation, maybe it’s time to take a step back, take a really good look at how
you’re doing things, and realize how you treat yourself and the people around
you. We all make mistakes and choices
that are not in the best interest of ourselves and others. But by being willing to change, and really
working at those changes, I believe good things will start to happen for you as
they have for me. Things might just turn
out better than you expected and you’ll be glad you made the choice to change!”
Blessings and Love,
Robin
